Quality Time Optional

I was listening to a podcast  earlier this spring and the host and expert were discussing; as part of a bigger conversation about youth, technology, and AI; how parents are (historically speaking) spending more time than ever with their children. But what the expert shared was that data shows that to “raise a quality kid and be a quality parent”, you don’t have to spend a ton of quality time with your kids. He goes on to explain that our job as parents is to be the “home base” and “provide a loving, warm, trusting relationship and a childhood with structure, order and discipline.” But time is not a factor here. 

Well, isn’t that a freeing notion?!

I have written about this before, but as summer is fastly approaching I feel like this advice really applies to take the pressure off making summer “magical” and “perfect” and every moment filled with fun. We are lucky to have neighbor friends my kids can run around with and both kids are signed up for a few camps. We will have plenty of days to fill and balance with work, but since I have a future 3rd and 7th grader, they will be fine with more open play and overall caring for themselves. Doing more chores and learning to do more self care tasks - as in making meals and loading the dishwasher, not meditation and yoga (though I would welcome a morning namaste together). We are planning to get my older child a “dumb phone” (talk and text only) so they can wander over to see friends in the adjacent neighborhood. 

We will of course have our usual summer rituals to have family time - but it sounds kind of nice to let go of quality time being the measuring stick of how good we are at parenting. Quality time optional is my summer mantra, I guess? What is your summer mantra? How do you approach quality time with your kids? I would love to hear about it - email me at cdziembowski@dtownctc.org. 

Happy almost summer!