The Parenting “Experiment”

By Carmen Glenn
A Note: As we start another school year, we are resuming our blog with two new authors (Carmen & Aria) who will give our readers a parenting perspective from elementary age through high school and beyond. We hope you enjoy our posts!

I recently dropped my oldest son off for his first year of college.  There were a lot of emotions running high.  My husband and I were excited for him to start this next phase, and at the same time sad knowing we would no longer see him every day.  We were looking forward to exploring his campus and getting a better feel for the city he’s living in as it is over 2000 miles away from where we live.  My son was looking forward to experiencing all the outdoor activities this area of the country has to offer and living “on his own.”  He was focused on getting his room set up and not being seen with his parents too often.  As we shopped for last minute things he needed, my mind would wander to the question I’ve thought about throughout this whole process.  How is he going to do in this next phase?

I honestly haven’t been that nervous about him going to college, which I recognize may not be the norm, at least from what I’ve heard and read.  He has always been independent and seems ready for this next step.  However, it has occurred to me that maybe I’m too confident or feeling overly presumptuous in his skills.  I’m not so naïve to think that there won’t be bumps in the road for him and us, but I believe that we will get through them.

Parenting is an experiment of sorts.  As parents we pour love, knowledge, advice and support into our children over many years.  As they get older, we let them have their space and learn on their own.  But questions remain.  Have we taught and provided him the right tools to thrive in this next step towards adulthood?  Have we had enough and the right conversations throughout his childhood?  Has he had enough experiences to be confident in who he is and the decisions he makes?

There are so many moments and experiences that go into raising a child and as our son makes his way through his first few weeks of college, I hope he soaks it all in.  Meanwhile I’ll repeatedly remind myself that he is where he’s supposed to be.  The night before we left him across the country, we went out to dinner and my husband asked him what has been the biggest surprise so far?  He responded with, “my ability to talk to people.”  I was caught off guard by his response.  I expected his answer to be something simpler, like how cold the overnights were on his freshmen rock climbing trip or how his new towels are extra fluffy.  Instead, he was already learning things about himself less than a week into this new environment.  His answer reaffirmed my feelings that he will be good where he is and maybe, just maybe, this experiment is going to have an incredible result.

How have your kids surprised you when entering a new phase? We’d love to hear about it - email us at: dtownctc@gmail.com.